We're Going to Boston!

Beantown, get ready for the Sanfords. Thanks to my amazing wife's personal best time of 3 hours and 38 minutes at the freezing Austin marathon this past Sunday, we are going to Boston in April for the Boston Marathon. Kathy ran strong and long (26.2 miles to those who don't know how insane this is) along with her running partner Becky Parker and they both qualified for the Boston Marathon on April 17, 2006. I smell a visit to Fenway Park for Daddy. Or is that my coworker's lunch I'm smelling? You never know in this office.

I also owe a big chest bump to my man Todd "T-Rich" Richards for his unofficial world-record time of 2 hours and 9 minutes in the half-marathon.

However, as inspiring as Todd, Kathy, and Becky were on Sunday, they were severely upstaged by this deer (scroll down to the offbeat section).

Hopefully Bambi will be staying at home on Patriots Day.

The Pursuit of Knowing Him

This week I've begun to sink my teeth into J.I. Packer's classic work, Knowing God. I've never read anything by Packer before, but his name and particularly this book seems to pop up frequently on must read book lists. With a hardy endorsement from my wife to boot, I am off and running.

In the book's first couple of chapters Packer draws clear lines between what it is to know things about God and what it is to truly know Him. He directly challenged my current burning interest in Theology with a great caution.

"We find in ourselves a deep interest in theology (which is, of course, a most fascinating and intriguing subject--in the seventeenth century it was every gentleman's hobby). We read books of theological expositions and apologetics. We dip into Christian history, and study the Christian creed. We learn to find our way around the scriptures... All very fine--yet interest in theology, and knowledge about God, and the capacity to think clearly and talk well on Christian themes, is not at all the same thing as knowing him. We may know as much about God as Calvin knew--indeed, if we study his works diligently, sooner or later we shall--and yet all the time(unlike Calvin I may say) we may hardly know God at all."

I think this is noteworthy to many of us growing in our faith and walks with God. As we grow in knowledge it can easily lead to a haughty attitude, a superiority complex, and flat out arrogance that doesn't glorify God on any grounds. We must be careful that we don't allow our knowledge to become the "knowledge that puffs up" as Paul once wrote. But how do guard against these results?

Packer goes on to say at the end of chapter 2, "First, we must recognize how much we lack knowledge of God. We must learn to measure ourselves, not by our knowledge about God, not by our gifts and responsibilities in the church, but by how we pray and what goes on in our hearts. Many of us, I suspect, have no idea how impoverished we are at this level. Let us ask the Lord to show us."

Very convicting stuff indeed. There is no doubt that the Lord has moved me to pick up this book for the very reason of keeping my ego in check as I pursue a very keen interest in theology. Tonight, I'll be praying that the Lord will show me how impoverished I really am by revealing the true condition of my heart.

Happy "Valentimes" Day Sweets

How lucky can one guy be?
I kissed her and she kissed me
Like the sailor once said
Ain't that a kick in the head?

I love it when I hear little kids refer to Valentines Day as "Valentimes Day". There is something extremely cute about that. I must confess, I actually thought it was really called Valentimes Day until I was about 15 years old. My beautiful wife and I said Happy Valentimes Day to each other when I left for work this morning. You see, it's the little things that make life grand.

I was reading Dustin's blog today about climbing a mountain with his wife on his honeymoon and it got me thinking of my own honeymoon in Tahoe and the mountain Kathy and I climbed together and the breath taking view from the summit.

We had to come down from Mount Tallac that gorgeous September day in California, but we have never stopped climbing together.


Thanks for being my companion on the big trail sweets. Here's to a grand adventure with you.

Why the World Hates Us

After a simply indescribable meal at Fadi's Mediterranean Restaurant last night, my sweets and I headed back to No Alarms headquarters for a couch-o-riffic viewing of the Olympics' opening ceremonies, not-so live from Torino, Italy. By the way, before we take this any further, I must implore you with utmost urgency to find your nearest Fadi's and order the combination kebob as if your very life depended on it. I'm talking an orgiastic feast of grilled beef, chicken, and lamb dipped in two secret savory sauces so sinfully delightful that I may have to repent of my enjoyment of it. Seriously, Jesus could return any moment and you may run out of time--don't roll the dice. You will thank me later. It would have been no less than criminal for me to exclude the Fadi's admonishment. Now, back to Torino.

Bob Costas was in usual spectacular form as he handled the host duties along with newsman Brian Williams (the only man in the history of America who has never been seen smiling). The pageantry of the various nations, replete with requisite funny hats, colorful attire and mini-flags a-wavin', made for an entertaining opener. They even had a guy get into a red Ferrari race car and burn donuts all over the stage--now this is not your father's Olympics. It's safe to say there wasn't a red-blooded male anywhere in either hemisphere who wasn't dreaming of being the guy behind the wheel of the Ferrari.

Sweets and I waited through what seemed like hundreds of countries I've never heard of, keeping ourselves awake for the Red, White, and Blue team to appear. And by the way, Costas has it on good authority that Serbia and Montenegro may be going splitsville in 2010. Can we get Billy Bush or Joan Rivers on this pronto?

What is also fascinating about watching the parade of nations is many of the smallest countries have only one athlete competing in the games. I kid you not, Ethiopia has a single athlete competing in the Torino games and do you want to know what sport? You guessed it, Ski Jumping. The National Geographic's I used to read when I was a kid never mentioned anything about the snowy white peaks or the plush ski resorts in Ethiopia. All those magazines ever showed were pictures of thousands of starving children and lots of empty dirt. Hmmm. Maybe this is why no one has seen Sally Strothers in years. Maybe while raising money for the starving kids, she got wise to the whole government ski resort conspiracy and was getting ready to blow the whistle on the whole operation. Someone must have been trying to keep Sally quiet. Geraldo?

Finally, the Americans came out of the tunnel waiving flags, taking video with personal mini-recorders, smiling like politicians on election day. It was very patriotic and wonderful to see the individual faces of the athletes and hear a little about their personal journeys. And then the NBC camera's found Kelly Clark, a former gold medalist among the US contingent of over 200. And what is Kelly doing? Talking on her cell phone. If that doesn't say it all about what's wrong with America today, I don't know what does. After all, the Olympic Opening Ceremony may be important to most people, but Kelly had to take the call.

Kelly, unless you are a heart surgeon, picking up the cell phone and jabbling away while representing your country before the entire known world screams only one thing. "Look at me, I'm so cool that even the Olympics are so lame that I would rather talk on my celly." I could only imagine eaves dropping on the call and hearing Kelly tell one of her cool friends (maybe even Paris Hilton) "...totally, like opening ceremonies are so 1988."

I'm sure Kelly isn't evil, but the whole thing smacks of arrogance and a lack of respect for the games, the United States, and all of the other athletes who understand the honor of participating in the world's oldest games. I'll put it to you this way, what would we think if an actress had her name announced as the winner of the Best Actress award at the Oscars and proceeded to walk up to the stage talking on her cell phone?

This is why the world hates us. Now go to Fadi's.

King of Pope?

Where do you turn when you are a middle aged, former superstar, repeatedly accused of child molestation, exiled from your own country, and teetering on the edge of bankruptcy? It appears the King of Pop may soon become the King of Pope. Michael Jackson, who's turned out nearly as many hits in the past 15 years as musical stalwarts Bruce Willis and Right Said Fred, may be taking his act to Rome.

Michael, this just in--the church is trying to repair its image. Just because you record on their album doesn't mean they will let you play with the altar boys.

We should have seen this one coming

Well, for years and years I have been warning people about the inherent dangers of rural parasailing. Sadly, my fears became reality this morning in Robinson, TX when this seemingly innocent father-son outing took a tragic turn.

How many more of our young men have to die for no reason? Can we get Cindy Sheehan to make some noise here? Why hasn't the Bush administration done anything to prevent tractor parasailing despite repeated warnings?

I want answers!

I'm OUT baby!

All right, all right, the constant pressure of living a lie has finally gotten the better of me. I can't, with good conscious, continue to hide the real me. I admit it, I'm a closet Dancing with the Stars fan. There, I said it...are you happy now? I bet you are.

I was around for the first season last Summer when the coveted title came down to Mr. Peterman vs. the lovely and talented (and did I mention lovely?)Kelly Monaco. There is something about ballroom dancing that just sizzles my bacon and I don't care if the world knows it.

The competition for the second season has been fairly intense with the early money riding on the famous long legs of WWE star Stacey Keibler. Soap star Lisa Rinna and K-list celebrity Drew Lachey are keeping things tight so far. By the way, I had to invent a new category of celebrity for Drew Lachey. He's not really a celebrity and he's not really kin to an A-list celebrity ala Frank Stallone. Drew is the brother of C-list celebrity Nick Lachey, better known by his former name, Nicky Simpson. Hence the K-list tag for little Drew. He's kin to a C-lister and that qualifies him for competition on DWTS. And therein lies the secret of the show's success--spot-on casting.

Last night Stacey started things out with a sultry Samba and registered the first ever perfect score from the judges. I nearly spit water all over my coffee table when judge Bruno Tonioli declared to Stacey in his Italian accent, "you are a weapon of mass seduction!" I love Bruno's over the top reactions--this guy is worth the price of admission.

Tonight we will find out who will be eliminated. If former NFL great and Hall of Famer Jerry Rice is the one to go, it will leave George Hamilton (pictured above)as the only remaining African American competitor.

Now that I'm out of the closet, I'd like to know what your guilty TV pleasures are. So?

HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY!

A shoutout is due to Punxsutawney Phil and all my other G-hog's on the most underappreciated holiday in America. Holla.

Welcome to the Blogosphere Dustin "Deluxe" Bennett

The ripples have been felt throughout the farthest reaches of blogdom today as our good friend Dustin "Deluxe" Bennett launched his sure-to-be solid gold top 40 hit blog. The fast-spreading news of this dramatic occurence is sure to make the Scott Farkus affair fade in the collective national concious.

I'm sure you'll want to join me in welcoming Deluxe to the world of blogging. Stop by here and say hello.